To Do lists

I read this article today, and it made me smile.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/08/the-funniest-kids-to-do-l_n_599758.html#s95829

What would our lives be like if we focused on the little things like these kids. I hope today that I can delight in the small "to do's " of my life.

inspired by these kids, here is my 'to do' list:

1. make banana chocolate chip muffins and eat one when it's warm.

2. stare at Connor

3. read Harry Potter #5

4. kiss Ben

5. be happy

I wish you all more than enough smiles to get through the day!!

-A

new eyes

this little man knows how to enjoy life. by watching him live, I learn how to see with new eyes.

thank you, C for teaching me.

I love you.

1k, 2k, Red k, Blue k

Bike update!

April 19: 4 km

What was supposed to be a short trip to and from daycare turned into TWO short trips to and from daycare when I got all the way home and realized I left the house keys and the phone in C's bag...it was a nice morning, and he loved the ride!

April 30: 18 km

My last day of class, and I biked to school. It looked like rain in the morning, but what a nice day it turned out to be! Unfortunately I wasn't the best planner and I forgot my lunch.

May 1: we didn't go biking, but we did have a blast at the park downtown! We brought a picnic lunch, a few books, and a few toys for C. There were children everywhere, and C had so much fun climbing and playing and running around. What a great sunny day! We got home, put C down for a nap, and then it rained. Perfect timing in my opinion.

May 2: 11 km

we have been biking to church as a family when we can, and this sunday, on our way back home, C fell asleep.

I wish I'd had the camera, but hopefully it won't be the last time.

So total km right now:

37 + 4 + 18 + 11 = 70 km!! Yay!

testing, testing...

School is officially over for the year.

My assignments are completed, my exams are marked, and my grades are posted. And unlike last summer when we moved to this wonderful city, B and I both have jobs already!

Last summer it took B six weeks to find work, and when he did, it was at a job that he complained about and didn't appreciate. This summer there is a change in his heart. His job now is no more fantastic than last summer. He might make a little more money per hour, and do less physical labour, but it's not a job he went to school for....The change is not in the work that he's doing, but in his attitude. I am amazed at the man that I married. Every day he is growing and changing into someone I am loving more and more and more. He is energized to go and work, to meet co-workers and do the customer service work that not many people enjoy.

B is loving life. Honestly, he's not really sure what he wants to do with it, but he is heading out and trusting that God has a plan. When he told me that after 5 years of post-secondary school, and after completing 2 degrees he didn't think he wanted to actually work as a teacher, a dream he told me he's had since he was 12, I was upset. I was disappointed and, I guess, selfish that he would change his mind....and then I had to remind myself that one year ago, after completing 4 years of university, I did the same thing when I enrolled in culinary school.

So we're both human. Neither of us is omnipotent...(and I am SOOOO thankful for that). At this moment, we don't know where life will bring us. We don't know what will happen in the fall, or next summer, or even tomorrow. But we're trusting God, and so far he's provided all our needs.

I have a job! It's almost my dream job too! I'm working at a fantastic bakery, and other than only working 2 days a week, I am completely excited about this new challenge.

We are blessed. C is a joy (some days more than others) and B is still my knight in shining armour, and I.... well I am still learning.

Today I'm learning patience and trust. I'm pretty sure those lessons are going to continue into tomorrow, but I'm working on today.

And so, here is a verse that came to me the other day when I was getting ready in the morning...

James 1: 2-5, 17

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

So my written exams might be over for this semester, but there are so many more life tests that I'll just have to wait for and do my best to prepare for.

with hope,

A.

the playlist of my prayers

Spring is here, and I'm stuck inside supposed to be studying for exams and doing projects...
But since I'm writing this, obviously my skills of procrastination are being practiced, not my skills of studying or project-doing.

The last few days the radio station I listen to has been having a pledge drive. While the begging for money is slightly annoying, the radio personalities are very upbeat and encouraging, and even through the beg-a-thon I still would choose this station over any other one...
I've listened to this station for probably over 5 years now since before I even started university. I remember specifically a time I listened to it before I did the Sea-2-Sea bike tour...so that was back in 2005.
I wanted to share some of the amazing music that has really touched my heart lately.

Better than a Hallelujah
(Amy Grant)

God loves a lullaby
in a mother's tears in the dead of night
Better than a hallelujah sometimes
God loves a drukards cry
A soldier's plea not to let him die
Better than a hallelujah sometimes
***
We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful the mess we are
the honest cries of breaking hearts
are better than a hallelujah
***
A woman holding on for life
a dying man giving up the fight
are better than a hallelujah sometimes
The tears of shame for what's been done
the silence when no words will come
are better than a hallelujah sometimes
***
We pour out our miseries,
God just hears a melody
Beautiful the mess we are
the honest cries of breaking hearts
are better than a hallelujah
***
Better than a church bell ringing
Better than a choir singing loud
singing out...
***
We pour out our miseries,
God just hears a melody.
Beautiful the mess we are
the honest cries of breaking hearts
are better than a hallelujah.


Sometimes people make such a huge thing about their prayers. Like the story about the pharisee praying out loud in the square with his hands up so that people could see what a "good" pray-er he was... this song really hit home for me in the personal relationship that prayer grows between us and God.
God doesn't ask for pretty words and proper grammar and sentence structure. He doesn't care how many "thees" and "thous" we put into our prayers. He wants our hearts. And our hearts are broken sometimes, but no matter how dirty or broken or hurting they are, when we lift our hearts to Christ, they are a beautiful sacrifice, because sometimes they are all that we have.

These last few weeks with B. gone, I've been home with C. by myself.
There are people around me who keep saying "you're so strong." and I would love to believe them, but I don't know how I'm getting through the days. It's like a fog sometimes. I feel as if I'm not really LIVING, I'm just SURVIVING. and I really want to LIVE.
The other morning I was driving C. to daycare, and this song was on my mind. I got into the car to head out, and as soon as I turned the car on, this song came on. The length of my drive was EXACTLY as long as the song was playing, and it ended as I put the car into park. I felt refreshed. Like God was just telling me to bring my heart to Him.

I talk so much about trusting God, and putting my trust in Him. and I need to practice it more. In every area of our lives we can trust God. whether it's with my finances, my schoolwork, my cleaning the house, my supervising C. so that the house doesn't explode....whatever it is, my strength and trust MUST come from my Creator.
I was reminded of that by a wonderful provision this week of a babysitter on a Saturday...I had begun to doubt that I would find someone to watch C, so I thought I would have to skip a class I signed up for, but out of the blue a lady from church called me and said that she would love to watch my son so that I could get some studying done...and she then said she would bring supper for me so I don't have to make food next week.....
So even without me praying for specific help, my panicked cry of "help" was heard and communicated to those who could help.
wow. my God is GREAT!

One other song that has been on my heart is "Beautiful History" by Plumb.
I think she's been around for a while, but I just heard this song a couple months ago and completely love her voice and her lyrics.

Beautiful History
(Plumb)

I have made mistakes
and I have been afraid
I have felt alone,
then you called my name
Things were crashing loudly,
happening all around me.
But your still small voice
was all that I could hear.

"I am here. I'm holding you.
You'll make it through this.
I am here. I am here."

Whenever you run away
Whenever you lose your faith
it's just another stroke of a pen on the page
A lonely ray of hope is all that you'll need
to see a beautiful history

Well I've been such a fool
When I have known the truth
I've wasted so much time
Doing what I wanted to
I've been living solely
for myself and myself only
But Your still small voice is whispering...

Whenever you run away
Whenever you lose your faith
it's just another stroke of a pen on the page.
A lonely ray of hope is all that you'll need
to see a beautiful history

I toss and turn and scream
I try to do everything
with two feet on the ground
I just keep falling down again.
I feel so far from home
Completely all alone
And then I hear you say

"I am here. I am here."

Whenever you run away
Whenever you lose your faith
it's just another stroke of a pen on the page
A lonely ray of hope is all that you'll need
to see a beautiful history.


I am so grateful for these lyrics that remind me that no matter how far away I run, I can always run back into the loving arms of God. No matter what happens, He is there.

And with that thought, I will sleep. Tomorrow is another day. One where I hope to trust in God more than I did today, and one where I hope that I talk to Him with honesty and openness...

Until next time.
A.

Biking, biking, biking!!!

I miss my bike....I'll rephrase that. I missED my bike. 2 summers ago was my last bike-riding summer before flying across the ocean and living in another country for 8 months....and then when I came back there was a giant BEAN growing...
and soooooo it's been almost 2 years since I've given my beautiful hunk of metal fantasticness any serious loving...
so last weekend I decided that since the snow is gone (except for little patches deep in the shade) it's time to give my bike the attention she needs! So I took her to the shop and got her all checked out (new chain, check the breaks and the gears, pump the tires....) and then I got to RIDE!!

My ride is a Giant OCR3 in turquoise....she is light as a feather and I feel like I'm flying when I ride her. I've had her for 5 years almost...and she took me all the way from Guelph, ON to Halifax NS one summer.
At our last apartment, someone left a beautiful red Devinci which needed some work, so since B didn't have a bike, he inherited the Devinci. we fixed it up with new brake pads and a new front tire, and now we can both do some serious rides!
C also had to get in on the biking fun and since he's WAY to little to try it on his own, we started looking at bike seats that mount just behind the handebars, and also rear mounting seats, and trailers, but we got a trailer in the summer and it weighs a ton, so we were hoping for something lighter.
at the bike shop in town, we asked if they had and bike seats available or that we could order, and they had one in the store that they sold us for half price! great quality, easy to install, and it's going to grow with C for at least 2 summers!! we were super excited, so now all of us have great, working bikes (or seats) and we can get out and explore this wonderful city!

I'm doing the 101 in 1001 challenge (I'm trying to edit and organize my list...please have patience with my OCD) and one of my goals is to put 10,000km on my bicycle, so I want to keep track of my process.

my bike rides so far:

March 5: 5.4 km (bike shop to home!!)
March 6: 2.5km (around the block and to the playground)
March 7: 11km (family biked to church and home!)
March 9: 18km (biked to school, to a friends, and then home)

TOTAL: 36.9km

I'm loving the weather, and I hope you all are too!!
happy trails!

rejoice, rejuvenate, refine....

ok, so I'm not the most technologically talented person. I'm far from fantastic with computers, and programming. I'm more of a pen and paper person than a computer person, but I like learning, and I'm curious about the idea of having strangers reading my words...

This is not January first, but I am making resolutions. I like to make changes before I start talking about all the "new" things that I MIGHT do in my life.
Also, I'm a champion procrastinator. I might win medals if they held an event and I actually chose to show up... so me writing on this blog on a regular basis is not yet a habit, but I'm working on it....once every few months...

I titled this entry "rejoice, rejuvenate, refine" and there are three parts of my life that I'm really trying to change; my mind, my body, and my spirit.

REJOICE
-my choice each day will be to look for the good in the world around me. Whether that means not judging those around me (even B. wait, especially B), or whether that means that in the midst of a crisis, I will try to find the positives...whatever it means, I will choose joy.

"These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full." (John 15:11)

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice." (Philippians 4:4)

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." (James 1:2-3)

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18)

REJUVENATE
-I am blessed with the gift of a body that still has all apendages attatched. However, using my body as a temple is not something that I have been doing for the last....lets say 2 years. Now this is the only body that I have on this earth, and I need to take care of it, or parts of it might start to expire before they should. This does not mean that I should start some extreme restricted diet, or that I'm going to be exercising like a mad woman for some crazy deadline like on the Biggest Loser or something....this isn't a competition, this is a lifestyle choice that I'm making (and have already started to make) where my whole family is eating more vegetables than potato chips...and drinking more water than carbonated beverages....Little by little the changes are already being made. Our diets need to respect the earth, and that means that we need to choose food that is sustainable, and as often as possible, local. Exercise has become such a negative and "scary" word, so I'm not going to call it exercise, I'm going to call it using my body to the best of my ability.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body." (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

REFINE
"to become pure"
-This is a process of changing my whole self: body, soul, mind, spirit....letting God make me into the person HE wants me to be. I'm a control freak, so giving over the reins, and allowing someone other than me to have control in my life is a big deal. However, I am a broken, sinful person, and I have gone waaaaay too long in the drivers seat. I'm struggling in my prayer life, and in my devotions...I can't even remember when the last time was that I really spent time on my knees asking for guidance. So I'm not giving up, I'm just going to follow for a while. I'm going to use the TWO ears God gave me, instead of using my ONE mouth and talking over everyone...and I'm not going to be perfect at it, but I am still going to persevere.

"If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1: 8-9)

What will this look like in my life??

I'm still working on all of these things, and it is a process, but my goal is to be a healthy, active servant of others; growing daily in my walk with God; growing in my relationship with my husband and family; and moving farther away from a "microwave" life of instant gratification towards a life that rewards persistance---EVEN if that persistence leads to failure.

A life without failure is a life lived in fear. I have confidence in Christ, even if I don't have confidence in myself.

"Have no fear of sudden disaster
or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
for the LORD will be your confidence
and will keep your foot from being snared." (Proverbs 3:25-26)

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit." (Jeremiah 17:7-8)



And let me end now with a beautiful Psalm that is a comfort to me.

Psalm 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills-

where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD,

the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip-

he who watches over you will not slumber;

indeed, he who watches over Israel

will neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD watches over you-

the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

the sun will not harm you by day,

nor the moon by night.

The LORD will keep you from all harm-

he will watch over your life;

the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.